August 24, 2005

Borowitz: Pat Robertson Urges U.S. to Covet Chavez' Wife

Filed under: Random Stuff — Bob Gifford @ 8:47 am

From Andy Borowitz:

Televangelist Breaks Second Commandment in Two Days

One day after Pat Robertson called for the U.S. to assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, the televangelist raised the ante again today, urging the U.S. to covet President Chavez’ wife.

In so doing, Mr. Robertson appeared to contradict two of The Ten Commandments in as many days, having flouted “Thou shat not kill” on Monday.

Speaking on the television program he hosts, “The 700 Club,” Mr. Robertson lashed out at the Venezuelan strongman once more, telling his audience, “It’s high time that the United States coveted Hugo Chavez’ wife.”

Warming to his topic, the opinionated preacher added, “And while we’re at it, we should covet his house, his manservant, his maidservant, his ox and his ass, for that matter.”

Mr. Robertson indicated that all of the coveting he referred to would not require a war, arguing that it could be all done through the use of covert operatives within Venezuela.

“We could send some special ops guys down there, and bang-bang, covet all of that stuff,” Mr. Robertson told his audience.

6 Comments

  1. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have my daily dose of Andy Borowitz!

    Peace,

    Mike

    Comment by Dr. Mike Kear — August 25, 2005 @ 5:11 pm

  2. But the really IMPORTANT thing that God cares about is whether we can get the Commandments back in the courthouses, not whether we actually observe them:)

    Comment by Public Theologian — August 26, 2005 @ 3:06 am

  3. Public Theologian,

    RIGHT!

    Comment by wildwest — August 26, 2005 @ 4:45 am

  4. hmm…I am just amazed at the messes people like Pat Robertson leave. Do you remember the last time a publicly well-known Christian apologized for doing something stupid? hmm…

    Comment by c.k. tygrett — August 26, 2005 @ 7:09 am

  5. Check out blog http://www.labelmeplease.blogspot.com You may be very interested in the “Jesus will destroy your party” post…

    K

    Comment by Kristin — August 26, 2005 @ 12:47 pm

  6. ROFL!!

    Comment by Tracie — August 27, 2005 @ 3:51 pm

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